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Last night we had a noisy storm of wind and rain. I got out this morning to take images between rain storms, it was messy out. Lots of puddles, dark clouds, tree limbs that were down and trash around Lovers Point from cans that had blown over. I struggled to get images that I was happy about, although I was glad to get outdoors and enjoyed the exercise.
My mood has been gray today, I napped this afternoon, after waking up to a weird incident last night. I was awaken in the middle of the night to the sound of the wind. When I woke up I noticed that one of the lamps in my room had turned on by itself. It was a strange feeling to wake up to light after I had gone to sleep with complete darkness. I'm assuming it had something to do with the storms, it felt odd and I had a hard time going back to sleep.
The birds were enjoying the puddles, splashing around and getting drinks.
I headed down the coastal trail, hopping puddles myself.
Grief is a lonely business. I find myself turning into myself. Friends and family check in, Noelle is with me and yet it feels like I'm an island sometimes. I think that healing is something that takes time to process. Walks continue to help me, I don't mind the time alone, in fact, it is in the alone moments that I feel like the healing takes place. I'm grateful for the love that I receive and I know that there are people around for me, although reaching out is difficult and there are times I just need to be alone.
I tried to cheer myself on the way home, looking for the color that I love. I spotted some fun tiles on a building in Pacific Grove, a cool dog sign on a local vet and I love the store windows.
It started to rain again on the way home and it continues to rain tonight. We need it and I'm taking advantage of the nap time. I'm hopeful that I will be happier with my images tomorrow. I am however appreciative that I got out today.
To Phil
I'm missing you
I can't make sense of any of this
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